Tuesday, October 30, 2012

The Bug

This is Jordan

And "bah"

This is what Jordan used to look like
Five pounds of indifference.

This chick is funny. Like a total crack-up. Those of you who are parents will I'm sure concede that one of the best things about brand new humans is watching their personalities develop. Jordan Elizabeth has been a riot from hour one. She was born extremely undersized - only 4 lbs 11 oz by the time we left the hospital - but seemed right away like she wanted to defy our estimation of her (fragile, dainty, helpless). She was like "Hey, I'm four minutes old and I'm gonna lift my head right off this table and look straight at you. Put that in your pipe."

Over the months - almost fifteen of them now - she's become increasingly hysterical. She is mostly pleasant and certainly outgoing; she eats her weight in anything you put in front of her; her hobbies are turning in circles in the same spot, dancing like a maniac maaayyniac, and supplying "pig face" on demand.

Like so.

I'd be harboring a grave omission if I didn't tell you she's gone a bit J-Lo on me lately (I don't just mean that booty), and I have come to accept that this diapered diva knows what she wants. And who knew that Stubborn (Jessie) + Stubborn (Sean) spawns Stubborner? I do now. It's possible that her realization that she has Sean wrapped easily twice around her pudgy pinky is a dangerous one.

I've got you where I want you.

Sean insists he'll be able to uphold his end of the discipline bargain but he's produced no evidence thus far. Good cop bad cop it is. She seems to have intuited her father's weakness because for a couple months now  she's been softly and affectionately cooing "dada... dada" on demand, but any request - no matter how desperate - for "mama" and she looks like a perplexed puppy, confused as to why you just rubbed her nose in her own pee. Thus the slow reel, pulling Sean in until all desserts, Polly Pockets, new shoes, cell phones, and credit cards are secured in her future.

But enough of the bad rap. The Bug (née LoveBug) has been the ultimate (if completely unexpected!) blessing. You know how everyone tells you from the second you're pregnant that "it goes by so fast"? That is true; I can't believe Jordan's one already. However what they don't say is that, as fast as the time with your baby has flown, you can't really remember a time before her.


  1. Love this, and especially love the last paragraph. Love you, Jess!

  2. oh woman. you are so funny. i do have to say i am glad i got to witness her little floor moment at the office. i got you where i want you! haha.