When Life Hands You Rolled Oats

Yesterday was a blur of NyQuil, Exedrin and Target trips - that is to say, Jordan and I did take a trip to Target, but I'm also pretty sure I was tripping on NyQuil and Exedrin.

I called in oh so very sicky sick to work yesterday after a night of insomnia, hacking cough, searing throat and dramatic flailing about. I sniffled and whimpered and shuffled my martyred self to Target with Jordan in tow that I might procure some healing off-brand drugs. I also did a quick breeze through the children's clothing but exercised Olympian resistance to blazers, boots and bonnets, with the help of the image of Sean's eyebrows raised precariously high should he look in on our checking account after such a spree. After being carded for my Exedrin (??) Jordan and I made our way home 'round about her naptime at which point she bequeathed me three full hours of solace. I used them to get completely - if unintentionally - delirious on NyQuil and, after attempt-fail-fail to nap, I trolled the internet and flipped listlessly through my Better Homes mag, looking quite alarmingly similar to one of the Walking Dead.

The only nice thing about calling in sick (<--- when you're truly sick and not just playing hooky, which is thoroughly delightful) is I actually get the chance to spend the day with my Jo-friend. By the time she awoke from her generous nap, the weather had done me a solid and mirrored the state of my health - doom & gloom

which is kind of my absolute favorite.

Jordan and I discussed the best course of action for the rest of our evening and she emphatically agreed to my cookie baking proposal. I've been meaning for weeks now to try out this scrumptious-looking recipe that my friend Meg (whose name is still not clickable *good-natured snarl*) sent my way, and I had every last ingredient for its execution except....chocolate chips. They had inexplicably disappeared by 4 that afternoon, but I'm fairly sure that is not directly correlated with my being at home for the day. It's under review.

A Whole Foods excursion and 365 Dark Chocolate Chunk purchase saw us back in the kitchen where Jordan was gracing us with her anticipatory cookie dance

which she chose to make a bit of a Tarantella thus her folksy yet aggressive use of kitchen towel.

In case you're so inclined to try these gluten-free and relatively healthful suckers out, I have described our professional process below. First, as with every recipe, you'll need ingredients

and this is unequivocally unhelpful, it's merely a gratuitous photo of Jordan.

So here they are in more accommodating form:

• 1/4 cup coconut oil, room temp
• 1 cup almond butter
• 3/4 cup granulated sugar
• 3/4 cup brown sugar
• 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
• 2 tablespoons ground flax mixed with 6 tablespoons warm water
• 3 cups gluten free or old-fashioned oats
• 1 1/4 teaspoons baking soda
• 3/4 teaspoon salt
• 1/2 teaspoon cinnamon (I did 3/4 teaspoon because I'm a cinnaho)
• 1 - 10 ounce bag dark chocolate chips (or you could go the chunk route like meee)

1. Preheat oven to 350°.

2. Cream coconut oil, almond butter, granulated and brown sugars until well blended. Add vanilla and the ground flax-water appetizing. Mix to combine, as supervised by your toddler

3. In a separate bowl, mix oats, baking soda, salt and cinnamon. Add to wet ingredients with chocolate chips and mix until they just come together, being careful not to overmix.

4. Place small balls of dough about three inches apart on a Silpat of parchment lined cookie sheet. Bake 10-12 minutes until puffy. Let stand five minutes before transferring to cooling rack.

I'll tell you something the original recipe doesn't: this dough is uber-sticky. I have always used a spoon and one finger to form cookies - and that's what I did this time around too - but you might be better off using two spoons, fancy Food Network style. By the time I finally formed the cookies to be baked into golden goodness

Jordan had completely lost interest.

I regained a little bit of her enthusiasm when the cookies were done (and hello Chuy McChewChew) Mine never got puffy as the recipe indicates; they actually turned out flatter than my usual pancakes. Nevertheless they were the scrumptious I Jordan was craving, and you can trust me on this one because I'm a much better baker than cook. 

Do enjoy.