Here I go again on my own...
I would finish that isolationist lyric were dieting and/or healthy eating the only road I've ever known. But in my belly of bellies I must admit to having known -quite recently in fact - roads constructed of eggrolls; roads paved in German Chocolate cake; roads embellished with toasty dip touting spinach and artichokes as the main ingredients, when one forbidden, irresistible taste will confirm beyond any doubt shadow that they are actually sour cream and mayonnaise. I guess Sour Cream-Mayonnaise-HeartAttack Dip doesn't have the same appealing ring. But clogged arteries never tasted so good.
My place of business this time of year is fraught with the aromas of my coworkers' baking endeavors; our brokers' efforts to buy our affection with chocolate (I can't decide if it's working yet....maybe one more 4 pound box of See's please?); Christmas cookie exchanges; attempts on my life via overeating.
Basically, this has been me:
I'm the duck.
But let's consider:
a) Healthy Roasted Zucchini
- zucchini: 36 calories for a whole cup. throw in cancer prevention and cholesterol lowering agent.
- olive oil to your taste: bolsters immune system
- kosher salt to your taste: in proper doses, good for blood cell and vessel preservation
- ground black pepper to your taste: improves digestion
but look at this and tell me truthfully that you're not dabbing drool out of your lap:
- 2 1/4 cups all purpose flour: starch, starch, starchity
- 2 tsp. ground ginger: ok alright, a natural remedy for colds
- 1 tsp. baking soda: um, when mixed with vinegar it's a good cleaning agent?
- 1 tsp. ground cinnamon: oh look, more health boosters in this recipe - antioxidants!
- 1/2 tsp. ground cloves: hey now, this recipe is lookin' up - antioxidant and anti-inflammatory!
- 1/4 tsp. salt: not so much that it'd hurt anybody
- 3/4 cup butter, softened: (wa, wa, waaaa)
- 1 cup white sugar: plummeting downhill at breakneck speed...
- 1 egg: trying to redeem the recipe...
- 1 Tbsp water: no harm, no foul
- 1/4 cup molasses: better than sugar or corn syrup, worse than chia seeds or green beans
- 2 Tbsp. white sugar for later: kick this recipe while it's down
Then, you should do what Sean does and pretend not to be interested and wait until I leave to put the laundry in the dryer then STUFF YOUR FACE. When questioned about it, just look at me and whimper "They taste like Christmas..."
So truthfully, if you were me, what would you choose? Wouldn't you concede that there's merit to both? For right now, I must choose the path of most resistance in recipe A. But at least it's still tasty, it's just not a ginger cookie damn it.
If you need me, I'll be the one in the middle, except Mickey-Sean will be splitting a zucchini into thirds, not a piece of carb-loaded bread, thank you. And if you've seen Mickey and the Beanstalk, then you know I'll eventually go mad with hunger and try to spear a live cow with my fork.